Viewing Others Differently

We have limited time with the people in our lives. If conscious experience is permanent in spacetime such as I'm exploring with the Conscious Permanence Project, then each interaction we have with others would be etched into the universe's record. Under this framework, each interaction becomes precious because it is not lived and then discarded. Knowing that a moment will persist confirms the importance of each moment.

If experience is permanently recorded as this project theorizes, then the quality of life is as important as the quantity of life when considering our total presence in spacetime's record. As the record of my life is enduring, I want to live such that its moments are as good as they can be. This perspective has changed how I approach my interactions with others.

The Gravity of Limited Time

The visits we have with aging parents are special as they are limited in number. Children will grow up and your time with them while they're small is fleeting. These examples remind us that every moment counts in ways you can't get back. But here's what surprised me: this same gravity can apply to every interaction you have with others.

For example, during my last visit with my parents these principles made me less bothered by minor annoyances. Instead of getting caught up in old family dynamics, I kept thinking: this moment matters, and how I engage right now becomes part of the permanent record of who I am and shapes who I'll become.

I noticed myself being more present, more patient, because I understood we were creating real experiences together. This realization made me limit time getting distracted or on devices and focus on being fully present and enjoying my interactions and conversations. I had a visit filled with precious moments I would like to relive rather than mindlessly taking our time together for granted.

Our Common Humanity

Before internalizing this philosophy, I failed to see everything I share with others: conscious experiences filled with pleasure and pain, and decisions made through the same neural machinery. Having this perspective about our common humanity has changed my experience with others.

I think the commonality of human consciousness connects people to one another. Strangers may appear different on the outside, but their physical and emotional experiences are processed by their brains in the same way as mine. This truly links us as human beings and makes the Golden Rule more relevant: "Don't do to others what you wouldn't want done to you."

Interacting with Others

When I interact with others now, I consider our commonality and find it easier to treat everyone with kindness. These principles even apply when someone is rude or hostile. When presented with this difficulty, I think of two things: how they became this way and potential healthy outcomes.

First, people have their current neural architecture by their unique history of life experiences. Whether they have had good experiences or role models really depends on random chance. Their current behaviors may be due to poor teaching or bad role models or simply not encountering arguments that showed a better path.

Second, I think about what I can do to make the future better from here. Now I can choose behaviors that help them towards something better. I don't often manage it, but this understanding shows me the possibility. Something as simple as a smile or funny response to a stranger can cause them to respond positively and help change their day. Acting in this way helps improve the overall humanity of the world.

A Different Way of Seeing

Those numbered visits with my aging parents are precious because they're limited. Now I put great importance on creating meaningful moments with them while I still can. And this perspective has shifted how I approach all of my relationships and interactions.

What if you tried this perspective for just one week? Notice if you are more present in conversations and choose patience over reactivity. Just knowing that everyone's responses come from their accumulated experiences, just as yours do, will allow an empathetic view of others.

We can choose interactions that help build better patterns, both in others and in ourselves, contributing to a better record for all of humanity.

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© 2026 Cory Lanker. This work is licensed under Creative Commons
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0).